Tough day and night

Well today is a tough one, the voices have been really bad today since he woke up. He can never explain what the sound like so I found this site where it has simulations of the voices.
After listening to this I don’t know how he deals with this and still leads a life. My mother in law offered to let me stay with them tonight if I could not stay with him, but how can I leave him here by himself with this happening? We got into an argument today which if anyone you know us is very rare! Today also marks the 2nd anniversary of my grams death so I am very emotional today as well!



Things are going well

Things have been going well, it has been a crazy busy and crazy hot summer. I am hoping that one it slows down ill start blogging more! We are planning a vaca to upstate NY in oct VJ will be working a fishing tournament and I will either help him or hang out on my own reading (my pastime) our little kitty is not so little anymore he is almost 16 pounds and VJ noticed today his collar is gone, how or where it is I have no clue he is an indoor cat only so we should find it soon. Lol.
The voices are still here but not so bad, I’m hoping to start the family to family course that NAMI offers!
Well that is all for now from the home front


Checking in

Hi all! Well we have had a busy few days. On say we celebrated my aunts 75th birthday and my dads 59th. Yes brother and sister my aunt is the oldest of 5 and the my dad is the youngest. Born 16 years apart my dad came up from de where he lives and put together a surprise dinner for 55 ppl at newicks in Dover nh. If you haven’t been there GO lol

Yesterday we had our 4th fishing event of the season our biggest turn out yet! I surprised VJ for his birthday (today) by having his whole family and my mom and stepdad meet us at the venue with some cupcakes I ordered to celebrate his birthday! Than tonight some friends of ours took us out to Olive Garden for our birthdays! Soo it has been a fun yet busy weekend. Night all

Wow it’s been a few weeks

Sorry it’s been a few weeks we have been busy, during the summer it is alway busy in our house, we celebrated my birthday 2 weeks ago with VJs mom and grandmother on Friday and than my best friends family had a birthday BBQ for me it was great we don’t get to see each other often but she is like my sister. VJ has been ok, couple of breakthrough days and he tries so hard to not let it ruin out plans, he is a good guy and I’m so lucky to have him in my life!

Sorry for the delay

Well it has been a long week! Sun we had a fishing event, it was fun but VJ didn’t catch anything so that started the voices again telling him he is a bad person and can’t fish and also telling him that I am always mad at him, trust me I’m not . It has been HOT here in MA and we live in a 3 rd floor apartment so the two of us are getting cranky. Lol. This will be fun we put in the second ac today hopefully it helps. Well time to run to the store for smokes and kitty food

Rough couple of days but getting better

Well hello again, been a rough couple of days with voices and such but seems to be getting better! *crosses fingers* last night I went to my monthly NAMI meeting with my wonderful mil. If you don’t know what that is, nami has different groups to help with clients and family members to be able to confidently talk about the issues they are going through! I love going and VJ encourages me to go! I am going to be taking g a 6 week course for family members on how to deal with the loved one and how to assist them, even tho my mil did this when VJ was first diagnosed she is willing to go again with me. Well we are watching a movie

The weekend

Well I know it has been a few days it has been a busy weekend in our house. Friday night was a bad night for us, the voices came back hard! VJ was curled up next to me almost shaking, he ended up hitting the wall. He gets so frustrated, I got upset and instead of him seeing me cry and get him even more upset I came out to our living room. He followed me out here and stood in the doorway, just standing there, not saying anything to the point where I was starting to get a little scared for the first time in 2 years. VJ doesn’t understand there is two of us, I am going through this as well as him no I don’t have the voices, but I sit here and can look into the face of my lover, best friend and see the hurt on his face. I can never show emotion such as crying do to the nervous feeling and no being able to do anything. He is learning tho. Saturday we had a graduation party for my little cousin at the family lake cottage in nh VJ had a great day, we even took the paddle boat out for a little and laughing at each other because of how much our legs hurt. I than brought him home cause he was starting to get a headache ( we both suffer from extreme migraines) and I went to babysit my nieces. And today VJ volunteered and I went to work for a few hrs for some much need ot. Than we spent the after noon fishing. The look on his face seems like it may be a good night! Well talk to you all later.
Much love